Hot Toddy [Frostbite Falls Christmas 2] (Siren Publishing Menage Amour) Page 4

  “You may not need it, but you deserve it. Whether you want to believe it or not.”

  No one had ever said anything like that to her. She had no idea how to respond. Their kindness and awareness made her shaky and uncomfortable, like she’d walked off the map and had no idea where she was anymore. “I don’t know what you want from me.”

  She was used to fading into the background. That’s the way she’d lived her life. At least until she’d come to Frostbite Falls. She couldn’t fade to the background here no matter how hard she tried. Though that was Jason’s fault as much as hers. Another parting gift from her ex. She wasn’t used to being seen by anyone, but especially not anyone like the Mannings or the warm jittery feelings their attention created inside her.

  “We want you.” The simplicity of Kyle’s words startled her almost as much as what he expressed.

  Her mouth dried. Her whole body froze and set ablaze at the same time. Images formed in her mind. Fantasies were all they could be. Right? “To do what?”

  “We want to be with you. We both do.” Chase’s hand brushed against her knee, the slight touch, combined with his words, had her jumping. A throb echoed between her legs. At least that was a familiar sensation. One she was used to feeling when she thought about the Mannings and their bodies this close to hers.

  She looked back and forth between them. “Both of you?”

  Kyle traced his finger down the side of her face in a slow, sweet gesture that had her whole body tingling. “Is that so surprising?”

  The words Jason had yelled at her as he ran out the door still echoed in her ears. The same words that had been running around her head since the day he’d told her he wanted to cancel their wedding because he’d found someone else. That he’d only wanted her because he thought it looked good to have a sweet mousy wife on his arm at company picnics and holidays. That said, without a doubt, she wasn’t what these men wanted, no matter what they thought.

  “Do you want both of us?” Chase glanced between her and his brother as his hand continued a little further up its path. Not far enough to make her truly uncomfortable, but enough her heart almost pounded out of her chest.

  “I don’t know. I’ve never thought about it.” It was a blatant lie. She’d thought about both of them a lot over the last six months.

  She’d think about being with Kyle every Friday after he came into the office to deposit his expense reports. All commanding and strong in his tan uniform with its big shiny badge. And she’d think about Chase on Thursdays when she’d see him out at the local bar, sipping a cold beer or two-stepping with one of the local girls, like Gigi Fallows. And then she’d think about them both all weekend long, changing one out for the other depending on her mood. Kyle for sarcastic and rough and tumble play, Chase for more passionate fun.

  She wasn’t sure why she couldn’t tell them. She just couldn’t form the words. Given the high raised eyebrows on both their faces, they didn’t believe her for a second.

  “If you want both of us, why’s it crazy we might both want you?” Kyle grabbed her hand. Each little callous across his palm brushed against her own set little quivers to life across her skin.

  Put that way, it didn’t sound as unbelievable as it felt. But it had to be. They couldn’t both want her. Certainly not if they knew the truth about her. “I don’t think you really want me.”

  “Why not, sweetheart?” Chase tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. “Why wouldn’t we want you?”

  The words Jason told her as he left echoed in her ears, impossible to ignore. “I’m cold.” That’s the nice way to phrase Jason’s comments. Frigid bitch were the words he’d actually used. Screamed them at her as he walked out the door.

  “Who told you that?” Chase’s eyes were intense. As much as she wanted to turn away, she couldn’t. Like a deer in headlights, she froze beneath the beam of his stare.

  “I think I know.” Kyle gripped her hand harder. She wasn’t sure if he did so to comfort her or hold his own anger back.

  She thought for a second she heard Kyle growl asshole under his breath, but she ignored it. He wasn’t the first to describe Jason that way. She’d done it more times than she could recall.

  “I don’t think that’s true, honey.” He didn’t look at all deterred by her words.

  Here she was, trying to give them a way out of this crazy arrangement before they found out exactly how frigid she was, and they weren’t going to take her up on it. The way they acted, she doubted they were even listening.

  The whole situation didn’t make sense in the best of times, no matter how appealing it might sound. What men could handle sharing a woman? They’d probably come to blows before the night was out, trying to decide who got her first.

  Her stomach turned just at the idea of them fighting over her. Sure, the idea sounded good until the roles were played by two amazing and wonderful men. Two men she could hurt with this crazy arrangement. Brothers that could be ripped apart by what they were doing. That’s the last thing she’d ever want, either of them to be damaged because of her.

  “I know one way we could find out.”

  She glanced up at Kyle. His determined gaze shook through her, rocking her to her toes. “Really?”

  Before she could process his intention, Kyle pressed his lips to hers. She sucked in a deep breath at the feel of his firm mouth against hers. He cupped his hands around her face, his touch hot and sweet against her skin. With a slight pressure, he slanted her head to the side, their noses pumped slightly as he positioned her at the right angle.

  The brush of his tongue against her bottom lip sent tingles shooting through her. She responded automatically, opening her mouth and accepting him in. The moan that slipped from his lips flamed through her. His hands tangled through her hair, gripping her nape and holding her close, not giving her space to do anything but react. Which worked fine for her.

  Without any intervention from her mind, she tugged him closer until her chest pressed against his. Her tongue brushed across his, tangling and playing with his as an ache settled deep in her core, creeping ever downward. The reaction was so quick and fiery it nearly stole her breath away.

  It had never been this way with Jason. With him, she’d always been concerned about what he was thinking, what he wanted, how he felt. She didn’t have to worry about Kyle. His desires were written in the brush of his lips. The sweet husky noises rumbled from his chest. His arms held on to her, as if he never wanted to let her go. It was amazing and addictive. And she wanted more.

  When he pulled away, it took everything in her not to yank him back. The big happy smile on Kyle’s face as he stared down at her curled her insides and only made her want more. The hunger in his eyes said he agreed. “Nothing cold about that.”

  He was right. The only word to describe that kiss was hot. Burning hot. Heat seeped into every corner of her body, filling in spaces she didn’t know were empty until Kyle touched her. Now everything inside her was warm. Warm and tingling and ready for more.

  No one would ever have described her as wanton. Not even in her teens. She never understood her friends who had droned on and on about kisses and men and sex. She’d never understood the appeal. But after Kyle’s kiss, she had a whole new appreciation for what they were talking about.

  “It’s my turn.” She spun toward Chase at his bold declaration. The smile on his face was truly dazzling. He was the most gorgeous man she’d ever met. Definitely the most gorgeous man who had ever looked at her like that. Like she was a piece of chocolate he couldn’t wait to get his mouth around.

  Wasting no time, Chase wrapped his hands around her cheeks and pulled her close. Their lips met in the middle. Unlike his brother, Chase immediately intensified the kiss. Every pull of his fingers and press of his lips filled with immediacy and need. She opened her lips to him, gladly accepting in his seeking tongue, his demand only inflaming her own. She groaned when he nipped at her lips, placing her hands on his chest, needing the solid feel of him ben
eath her palm to keep from floating right off the spot.

  She couldn’t remember warming up so easily to any other man, let alone two. Maybe there had been more in those Mistletoe Mimosas than just champagne. What she had no idea. She couldn’t think of anything that could possibly make her so crazy so quickly.

  A part of her knew she should be ashamed for kissing two different men in one night. Two brothers no less. But it didn’t feel wrong. It felt good. Naughty in a way that curled her toes in satisfaction. And she wanted more. So much more.

  He sucked her tongue, a moan rumbling against her lips. Her body shook and her mind swum beneath the delicious vibrations. She leaned closer, needing to feel his body against hers. But her angle on the couch didn’t afford her enough space to shift as close as she wanted.

  Before she realized what she was doing, she threw a leg over his hips and straddled his lap. She moaned at the feel of his warm body against hers. Her fingers explored the hard ridges of his chest, detailing each one with the dedication of a geologist.

  Most amazingly, she wasn’t thinking. She wasn’t second-guessing the way she normally did. Her body acted on its own, seeking out the pleasure only they could give her. It was that simple.

  “You’re so hot like that, sweetheart.” Kyle’s husky groan echoed somewhere in the back of her mind, but she couldn’t focus with her breasts pressed against Chase’s chest. Chase tugged her closer, and she fought the urge to rub against him to relieve the ache in her cunt. Something inside her told her that no amount of squirming and rubbing would satisfy the need inside her. There was only one way to quench that fire, and it couldn’t be done on this couch. At least not with this much clothing on.

  When she eased away from him, heat flooded her face. She must be red as a tomato. She cast her eyes down, unable to meet Chase’s gaze, and condemnation she was sure would be there. That would be the only appropriate response to what she’d done. Climbing on his lap and almost dry humping him seconds after kissing his brother. “I don’t know where that came from.”

  She’d never climbed on Jason and kissed the crap out of him. She’d never felt comfortable jumping Jason and dragging him back to their bedroom. A part of her had always worried he’d turn her away, or deny her altogether. It sounded crazy to her even now. What man turned away sex? But she’d never been able to eliminate the worry completely. Not for the full length of their relationship.

  Yet she’d managed to do it now.

  How was it possible she felt more at ease with Kyle and Chase than she had with Jason? She barely knew them. She’d been with Jason over three years.

  “It came from you, sweetheart,” Kyle pushed the hair back from her face, kissing her below her right ear. The combination of Chase’s arms wrapped around her as Kyle kissed her neck thrilled her right to the bone. It was indecent and dirty and so much more than she’d ever envisioned. “There’s a lot of passion in you, sweetheart, buried beneath the surface.”

  She looked down at the cushions of the couch, unable to meet their gaze “It never was like that with anyone else.” The avowal ripped at her throat.

  Chase coasted his hands up her legs, as if he couldn’t stop touching her for a minute. “That’s because no one else ever put you at ease enough to be yourself.”

  Was that true? It was hard to believe in three years she had never felt comfortable with Jason in that way. But in all their time together Jason hadn’t learned the way she took her coffee, or remembered her favorite flower or meal. She’d never thought those things mattered before tonight. Or the way a small touch could set her insides glowing.

  With Jason, she’d always felt the need to prove herself. Prove she was good enough, that she was enough. Especially toward the end, as he continually put on off choosing a date or location or deciding on any plans for their wedding, besides his best man and what type of bachelor party he wanted.

  But Chase and Kyle didn’t make her feel like she was walking on eggshells. Or that if she did or said the wrong thing, they’d walk away. If anything, they wanted the opposite. At the moment it didn’t look like anything, besides maybe nuclear war, would force them to step away from her. Which was far scarier.

  “Do you want more?” The husky rumble of Chase’s words shivered across her skin.

  Did she? The rational part of her encouraged her to say no. It was crazy to even consider being with two men at a time. That wasn’t something good girls did. Maybe girls with tattoos, who went on spring break wearing midriff-bearing shirts, took those kinds of risks. But not girls like her.

  Being a good girl hadn’t gotten her where she wanted to be either. She’d ended up alone, left for a bleach-blonde bimbo with more silicone in her body than brains. Maybe it was time to act bad. Hell, Tracey probably went on spring break back in her day. Maybe she even entered a few wet T-shirt contests.

  And if there was anyone worth being bad with, Kyle and Chase were at the top of the list. They made her feel sexier than anyone had before.

  “You don’t have to, sweetheart.” Kyle brushed his fingers across her shoulders, sending a shiver down her spine. “That’s not what this night is about.”

  She knew that. If Kyle and Chase wanted an easy lay, there were easier targets than her. She hadn’t done anything but make this more difficult for them. They wouldn’t have spent months getting to know her, learning what she wanted, just for a quick roll in the hay.

  She looked up to Chase’s earnest eyes. It had been long enough. She wanted to move on. Before tonight she had thought this part of her life might be over. That no one would want her again. Especially after what Jason had said to her as he walked out. Now she had an opportunity to prove them all wrong.

  One man had seemed ridiculous to ask for hours ago. Now she had two interested. She’d be crazy to not take advantage. But could she really handle both of them?

  * * * *

  Chase focused on breathing as he stared at the woman on his lap. The woman they’d lusted after for months. She looked so vulnerable in his arms. All he wanted was to hold her close and never let her go. If she wanted somewhere to belong, they could give that to her. Right here on the ranch with a family that loved her.

  She nibbled on her bottom lip. The nervous gesture had his chest collapsing. God, he wanted to wipe that look off her face. For good.

  “You want me to go to bed with both of you?”

  Oh boy did they. He wanted to take her to bed and never come back. To spend the rest of his days feasting on her and showing her how special she was. Clearly, no one else ever had.

  Chase pushed the hair back from her face, cupping her cheeks as he stared into her jewel eyes. “We both want you. We don’t see any reason to make you choose.”

  It was the simplest way of putting it, but for Lydia it was the best he could do. She didn’t need to know about the hours of negotiation it had taken to land on this decision. At least not yet.

  “It’s not as unusual as you think,” Kyle added in, calming her in his own Johnny Law logical way. “In the past it was quite common. Back when there weren’t enough women around for every man.”

  “And now?” She looked at his brother skeptically, pushing him for more, and Chase swore he fell in love with her a little more. No one questioned his brother when he used the resolute tone. No one but him, and now her.

  “The practice hasn’t died out as much as many think. It’s just gone underground.” Kyle’s no-nonsense tone didn’t eliminate every question in her eyes, but some of the tension drained from her shoulders. At this point he’d take any good news he could get.

  “And that’s the type of relationship you want?”

  Chase stroked his hands down her back, loving her body next to his, her muscles fluttering beneath his touch. “We weren’t exactly looking for it, sweetheart, but once you came into town, it wasn’t a decision anymore.”

  The second he’d seen her at the Two Step, he had wanted her. Sitting in the booth next to Victoria, she’d looked so hurt and fragil
e, in need of his protection and affection. Like a beautiful flower that hadn’t received enough sun. And he was more than willing to offer her that light and warmth.

  He’d known the truth in that moment. She was the one for him. The only one he’d ever need. He’d been ready to drop down on one knee and propose to her right then. Of course he hadn’t. That would have been crazy, even if he hadn’t noticed the ring on her finger.

  When Kyle had come home that night, talking about the new girl at the county clerk’s office, he hadn’t realized it was the same girl. It wasn’t until the next week, while he was on his way to the Sullivan’s feed store he’d spied his mystery girl walking into the county clerk’s office, that he had realized they lusted after the same person.

  And still, it hadn’t occurred to him to share her. He’d still been trying to figure out how to handle their predicament when he walked in on his brother and Lydia talking in line at Herbert’s. The way she joked and laughed with Kyle, calling the big mean sheriff on all his crap. He’d realize in one look how much his brother needed her. Maybe more than he did.

  He couldn’t deny his brother what he needed, any more than he could walk away from her. But convincing Kyle had taken a lot more work. Weeks of discussion, negotiation, and convincing had to occur before he would even consider the idea. And even then, he hadn’t been sure.

  Not until Kyle had walked into city hall and saw the two of them chatting while Chase paid off one of his many parking tickets. Taking in the sight of the two of them talking, close and intimate. That day he’d changed his tune completely.

  After his brother, Chase had never worried about having to convince Lydia of their plan. There was no way she could be more stubborn than Kyle.

  “But it’s up to you, sweetheart. It’s all up to you.” Kyle brushed his fingers over her shoulder, tracing along the edge of her red dress. Chase wasn’t sure if someone else could see the desperation in his brother’s words, but he noticed. And felt the same.

  Her throat moved as she swallowed. Her eyes glanced between them. He agreed with his brother completely. If she said no, if she wanted to stop, he’d drop his hands from her and walk away. He’d never pressure her. But god how he hoped she didn’t say no. Now that he finally had her soft body pressed again him. The taste of her lips on his tongue. It might kill him to walk away from her.